Beauty in Differences
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| Happy Monday |
Sophomore year of college made me question myself and if I was smart enough to really get through these next two and a half years. It sounds silly, but I began asking myself if I would physically survive college. This past semester I was diagnosed with IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome); I have found it can be common among college students. My IBS is caused by anxiety, stress, and nervousness. On test days my stomach hurts to the point where I avoid eating, and I find myself miserable until I walk out of my test feeling like a ton of bricks have been lifted off of my chest. Thankfully my doctor has prescribed me medicine to better handle my anxiety and the effects it has on my body.
My anxiety differs among different situations throughout my day. If a change in my schedule quickly occurs, I do not handle it easily. I can shed frustrated tears in the matter of minutes over something that may seem so minor to anyone else. I can be stressed over something that isn't supposed to take place for another three days. I even get anxious and nauseous before each of my softball games and worrying about the outcome that doesn't happen for another seven innings. These are flaws that I have not easily accepted or come to entirely understand.
Today I felt extremely defeated. I was texting and talking with two of my best friends about how on the outside I can look extremely calm and feel relaxed, but on the inside my stomach is in knots. I began getting frustrated because I felt like I had no control over my body. My friends and family constantly try to calm me down and tell me I am worrying over small things, but to me these small things are life changing. Taking time to talk to God each day, read His word, or listen to His music (Chris Tomlin Pandora) has allowed me to escape from this world I see filled with anxieties and truly find peace and relaxation.
“So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today." Matthew 6:34
God tells us not to worry about tomorrow because we will encounter an abundant amount of tomorrows in our lifetime. If you choose to worry about what will happen the next day, then you will continuously worry about every detail of every day to come. This speaks to me when I look at my planner. I have assignments and quizzes/tests written down for this week and the weeks to come. I often worry about tests three weeks in advance or even before the new material has been introduced and taught. However, I have started focusing on the day at hand and what I need to accomplish in order to make it to the next day. As the Lord tells us, today's troubles are enough to handle. You will face obstacles throughout your day, but how you choose to persevere and accomplish these hurdles will be the defining moment.
"When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles." Psalm 34:17
Prayer has taught me that whenever I feel overwhelmed, anxious, or stressed I can always talk to God about what is going on and ask him to guide me in the right direction. He may not answer me right then, but he has never failed me in the days to come. He has shown me how to find the beauty in differences when compared to my classmates. Every day I get a better handle on my anxiety and how to deal with it. I have learned how study concepts differ among everyone, and although it may take me longer to complete an assignment or study a lesson to understand what is going on, it does not make me any less of an intellectual human being. We all handle things differently. We are all flawed, but we are all "fearfully and wonderfully made" by the hands of an amazing Creator. I hope you spend your week living life, loving yourself, and laughing at the little things.
With Love & Laughter,
Alison
My anxiety differs among different situations throughout my day. If a change in my schedule quickly occurs, I do not handle it easily. I can shed frustrated tears in the matter of minutes over something that may seem so minor to anyone else. I can be stressed over something that isn't supposed to take place for another three days. I even get anxious and nauseous before each of my softball games and worrying about the outcome that doesn't happen for another seven innings. These are flaws that I have not easily accepted or come to entirely understand.
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| A thousand times I've failed, still Your mercy remains And should I stumble again, I'm caught in Your grace Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades Never ending Your glory goes beyond all fame |
“So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today." Matthew 6:34
God tells us not to worry about tomorrow because we will encounter an abundant amount of tomorrows in our lifetime. If you choose to worry about what will happen the next day, then you will continuously worry about every detail of every day to come. This speaks to me when I look at my planner. I have assignments and quizzes/tests written down for this week and the weeks to come. I often worry about tests three weeks in advance or even before the new material has been introduced and taught. However, I have started focusing on the day at hand and what I need to accomplish in order to make it to the next day. As the Lord tells us, today's troubles are enough to handle. You will face obstacles throughout your day, but how you choose to persevere and accomplish these hurdles will be the defining moment.
"When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles." Psalm 34:17
With Love & Laughter,
Alison
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